A child does not always come home and explain a difficult day at daycare. For preschoolers, finding the right words can be hard. Sometimes they may not understand what happened, and sometimes they may simply move on without telling an adult. The recent Texas daycare lawsuit, in which parents allege that a substitute teacher became involved in a fight between children, has again raised questions about how much parents can actually know about a child’s day away from home. The allegations remain part of an ongoing civil case and have not been established by a court.For parents, the bigger lesson is not to become suspicious of every change. It is to notice when something feels different from the child’s usual pattern.
22 Sept 2026 | 14:56
Does your child tell you everything about school? What helps them open up?
The child suddenly does not want to go to daycare
A little resistance at the door is common, especially after weekends or holidays. But a sharp change deserves attention. If a child who once walked in comfortably starts crying, clinging, hiding or repeatedly asking to stay home, parents can gently ask what has changed. Fear of returning to school or childcare can be a sign that a child is struggling.
Bedtime suddenly becomes difficult
Nightmares, trouble falling asleep or repeated waking can sometimes accompany stress. So can a child becoming unusually tired in the morning. Sleep changes alone do not point to a particular cause, but a new pattern alongside other changes is worth noticing.
The child’s play starts telling a different story
Preschoolers often communicate through play before they can explain complicated feelings. Watch for a noticeable shift towards repeated themes of fear, punishment, fighting or hiding. It does not mean that the child is recreating a real event. Play can reflect many everyday experiences. But a sudden and persistent change can open the door to a gentle conversation.
The child becomes unusually quiet, angry or clingy
A child who is normally chatty may suddenly stop sharing stories about daycare. Another child may become unusually irritable, aggressive, withdrawn or fearful. Child-welfare guidance lists sudden behavioural changes, withdrawal, aggression and anxiety among possible signs that a child needs attention.
There are unexplained injuries or repeated complaints
A bruise on a playful preschooler does not automatically signal wrongdoing. Children fall, bump into things and get into ordinary arguments. The concern grows when an injury has no clear explanation, the explanation does not fit the injury, or similar incidents keep occurring. Unexplained bruises and other injuries are among the signs that warrant closer attention.
The child suddenly avoids one person or place
Pay attention if a child repeatedly becomes frightened around a particular caregiver, classroom or activity. It is important not to decide what happened based on avoidance alone. A new caregiver, changed routine or difficult interaction with another child can also cause distress. Still, repeated fear should not simply be brushed aside.
The child gives a small clue, then changes the subject
Sometimes the most important sentence can sound almost casual: “Teacher shouted at me,” or “I don’t want to go there.” Instead of immediately asking a string of questions, stay calm and invite the child to continue. Open-ended questions such as “Tell me what happened” give children more room to describe events in their own words. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends simple, open-ended conversations when children are struggling to express feelings.
What parents should do when something feels wrong
The first response matters. Listen without frightening the child or supplying answers. Avoid repeatedly questioning the child or suggesting what they should say. Write down concerning statements in the child’s own words, keep track of injuries or behavioural changes, and speak with the daycare about what happened. If there is an unexplained injury or continuing concern about safety, a pediatrician can help assess the child and guide the next steps.Disclaimer: These signs are not proof of abuse or mistreatment and can have many other causes. If a child has an unexplained injury, discloses harm, or appears to be in immediate danger, seek medical or professional help promptly.